Tag Archives: sore breasts

Screw you, hope.

15 Saturday Jun 2013

Posted by in Musings

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I didn’t sleep well last night. My boobs were too sore to sleep on my stomach, so I tossed and turned all night. Today, they’re still very sore and so swollen that I had to break out the serious support bra. Sitting here at my desk at work I starting counting backwards to when I had my last period (’cause why bother to keep track any more, right?) and realized it was 29 days ago, I’m late. 2 years of infertility treatment, 3 doctors, 2 failed IVF’s, 2 failed IUI’s and 1 miscarriage have finally beaten it in to my head that I can not have babies. Can’t do it. The few eggs I have left are hard-boiled. I know full well it’s my period coming. I know there is no chance I’m pregnant. But yet I sit here poking at my sore breasts and wondering if I should go get a pregnancy test, knowing full well that my period will start the minute I plunk down the money. And yet…. *sigh*hope-is-pointless

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11pd2dt – BFP symptoms

10 Wednesday Oct 2012

Posted by in 2WW, Results

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So I am 11dpt2dt or 13dpo and I am pregnant. I may not be pregnant tomorrow, but 3 faint but clear tests confirm that I am pregnant right now (2 FRER and 1 CVS Early, in case you’re wondering). I’ve spent countless hours wasting time on Google looking for early pregnancy symptoms so now that I have them, I’d like to share!

Breasts – they’re definitely bigger than usual and tender, but no more so then they are right before AF. I have felt like my nipples have been behaving badly – getting erect for no reason and kind of tingly, which is different. No big blue veins or enlarged nipples or anything.

Cramps – still cramping, although not as badly as I was right after ER and ET and in the few days following. The shooting pain in my right ovary is pretty much gone. Last night I started getting weird little tugging sensations about 4 fingers below my belly button. It was subtle, but different.

Bloating – gone. Those 8lbs I gained this cycle are still with me but I’m feeling much better about them now!

Discharge – as I mentioned in a previous post this was the only symptom I had that couldn’t be explained by the meds.  It’s still with me – it happens once or twice a day and is like the watery discharge you get right around ovulation.

And that’s it. No nausea,  no metallic taste in my mouth, no increased sense of smell, no more tired than usual.

I still don’t really believe it. I want to pee on 10 more tests.  I want that beta.

And I realize now that this stage (which I have been so earnestly striving towards for so long) is just another waiting game.  I would get so annoyed with people who had gotten their BFP and were complaining about the time between betas, or that their BFP lines were slightly different colors. They were pregnant for gods sake – be thankful, stop nitpicking! I get it now. It’s still precarious. It could end at any moment. I feel like so many of us on this IVF journey have had so much bad news, so many failed tests, so much heartbreak that we don’t accept good luck when it happens. We’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop.