Just got back from the teaching visit with my RE, where I wrote the biggest check I’ve ever written in my whole life. Here’s the plan!
- 10/25 start Lupron
- 10/29 stop BC
- 11/4 start Estrace
- ~11/17 – ultrasound lining check
- ~11/18 Donor egg retrieval
- ~11/19 we’ll be told how many eggs were retrieved
- ~11/20 we’ll be told how many fertilized
- ~11/24 Transfer
- ~12/3 Beta
Everyone I spoke to told me how much they loved my donor, how sweet she was, and how excited she was to be starting the cycle. I’m putting together a little gift basket for her – the DE nurse says I can leave it at the clinic and they’ll give it to her the day of the retrieval. I got a nice basket and lined it with Thanksgiving themed kitchen towels. I’m putting in a stuffed animal (for her young son), a Willow Tree angel (here), a jar of homemade bath salts and homemade soap and some chocolate. I’ve also gotten an artist friend of mine to hand paint a card. Now I just have to figure out what to say! I mean, how do you thank someone for this? I have one chance to express to this woman how much this act, this gift, will mean to me and my family. I want her to know how much I appreciate her putting herself through this (I’ve been through IVF – it’s rough). I know she’s getting paid and I’m sure the money is an important consideration for her, but there are easier ways to make a buck. Plus, according to my DE nurse she isn’t doing this for the money – she seems to truly have altruistic intentions. Maybe they always say that, I don’t know. Regardless, I want to give her some sense of how grateful and thankful we are.
You know, it’s weird. IVF, DE, infertility – it’s a super intensity experience. And somewhere, nearby, is a women who is thinking of me and I am thinking of her. We’re on this parallel path, she and I, with coordinated cycles, blood draws, doctor visits. We’re both going through a significant amount of trouble, spending an incredible amount of time to achieve a common goal, and yet I’ll never meet her. I think of her every day, and I’m sure she thinks of me sometimes, and we’re sharing a very unusual and strangely intimate experience, but we’re strangers. It’s just….odd.
I am so glad you are sharing this journey with us, thank you. So hopeful for you! xx
How exciting! You’re right–it is a bit odd, but also a beautiful experience the two of you are sharing!
Love the idea of this basket. So pleased its all going ahead x
Your donor sounds really great, I’m so glad you found her.
It is weird! And awesome! The card should say thank you! Because really, that is all there is to say! Your gift basket sounds very lovely! Wishing you luck with this cycle!!!
I’m wishing you so much good fortune…please let the serendipity continue, Universe. xo
You’ll never forget each other. Your basket is a beautiful idea.
I was an egg donor (resulted in the birth of two children at two different times for the same family) and I LOVED the card and the gift basket my recipients gave me. It made me feel like they treated me as a person rather than a commodity or a means to an end. I have kept her card and still have it, more than a decade later.
I wish you all the best for this cycle!
Hi! Thank you for your comment, and thank you for being a donor! I would never want our donor to feel like a commodity – I have certainly never thought of her that way. Do you have any advise for what else might be nice to include? I really want her to know how much we appreciate her and how…amazing I think what she’s doing is.
Honestly, I think more than the contents of the basket, she will be touched by the gesture and whatever words you choose to write in the card. Just that you are doing this will likely mean a lot to her! I love the homemade stuff you’re including. How about a nice cozy pair of socks? I’m a sock lover, but cozy socks are always a hit! 😉