In my last post I said “I guess that means frozen eggs are out unless by some miracle a reddish haired, medium height, green-eyed donor who explicitly wants an open donation pops up on Donor Egg Bank. It could happen, right? Based on my track record with infertility…my magic 8 ball says “Not likely”.”

Well, a strawberry-blonde, medium height, blue-eyed donor showed up today on Donor Egg Bank. She’s cute, funny, and likes science (!). Good medical history, good health, repeat donor. Her reasons for donating aren’t my favorite, but whaddyagonnado? I checked 4 different times during the day waiting for her to disappear like some sort of frozen golden egg mirage, but she’s still there. I’ve emailed the nurse in charge of donor issues and asked if we can find out if she’s open to possible future contact. I’m afraid to hope, but surprisingly (to me) I’m mainly just excited. Excited that we might be able to get a donor (who meets our criteria) without wiping out our finances for the foreseeable future. Excited that I could (unlikely but possible) be pregnant  this fall. Excited to be excited instead of just sad, or angry or mopey.

Also, I want to say thank you for all of the thoughtful, helpful, wonderful comments and responses to my posts. This has been (and continues to be) a frightening and lonely journey, and you all are my light in the darkness. I feel heard, supported and understood. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.